What IF God was one of us?
June 22, 2012
Right, I'm only writing this because floods meant I couldn't get to my gig tonight, don't think I like you. Anyway, here is a review, I am in it. He doesn't say I'm the best one, in fact he specifically states that Matt Reed is, but I was:
http://www.gigglebeats.co.uk/2012/06/fuckwits-simon-donald-matt-reed-steffen-peddie-nick-cranston-and-lee-kyle-at-the-newcastle-stand/
Anyway, I'm doing the only thing that anyone would do when sans gig, I'm dissecting the lyrics of the Joan Osbourne hit 'What if God was one of us?' you know, from the nineties? She was a sort of Gen-X Dana.
If God had a name what would it be?
-It would be God.
And would you call it to his face?
-Yes, I would. I'm not sure why you would think he'd be insulted. Calling someone God seems like a compliment to me.
If you were faced with him in all his glory
-What, with nowt on?
What would you ask if you had just one question?
- I would ask him 'If God has a name, what would it be'. Either that or I would ask for a million more wishes. Oh wait, that's genies.
And yeah, yeah, God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah
-She's fucked this up, she should have started with good and moved on to great, this makes it sound like God is getting worse throughout the chorus. Next line would be 'yeah, yeah, God is alright' then 'yeah, yeah, God is shit.
What if God was one of us?
-Like when he was Jesus for a bit? Don't know, what of it?
Just a slob like one of us
-God is a slob like one of us. He used to do loads of shit, making the World, fooling people into killing their kids, shit like that. Nowadays we are lucky if he finds time to turn up in some toast.
Just a stranger on the bus
- I DON'T KNOW! What if he was a fella on a bus, what am I supposed to do?!?
Trying to make his way home
-On a bus? To heaven? Come on Lord, buck your ideas up mate, buses don't go up. Remember that old song where it goes 'You'll never get to heaven, in an old Ford car?' God is niave to think a bus would be any different.
If God had a face what would it look like?
-David Bellamy
And would you want to see
-I'd probably be a bit curious yeah but I'd probably be a bit curious just to see David Bellamy
If seeing meant that
you would have to believe
in things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints
and all the prophets
-WOAH! That's not on. Just because I accidentally look at a stranger on a bus who happens to be God, doesn't mean that I have to believe in all the prophets. Some of them sure but that Isiaih always struck me as a right chancer.
Trying to make his way home
Back up to heaven all alone
- Not all alone, Mary will be there and Florence Nightingale probably and Hitler if he was sorry. There'll be loads to do. Can't get there on a bus though (See earlier.).
Nobody calling on the phone
-I don't know his number, plus, as you've said, he's a stranger. Plus, he's on a bus, annoying when people speak on the phone on a bus. God would know that.
'cept for the Pope maybe in Rome
-'Alreet God, it's me, Benedict' Okay, so it would have been John Paul in the mid nineties.
Just trying to make his way home
- You want to get off the bus mate. Hang on, doesn't God live everywhere? This Osbourne lass is a fool.
Like a holy rolling stone
-Perhaps this means Brian Jones is in heaven? Devil's music my arse.
Next week, Bitch by Meredith Brooks.
http://www.gigglebeats.co.uk/2012/06/fuckwits-simon-donald-matt-reed-steffen-peddie-nick-cranston-and-lee-kyle-at-the-newcastle-stand/
Anyway, I'm doing the only thing that anyone would do when sans gig, I'm dissecting the lyrics of the Joan Osbourne hit 'What if God was one of us?' you know, from the nineties? She was a sort of Gen-X Dana.
If God had a name what would it be?
-It would be God.
And would you call it to his face?
-Yes, I would. I'm not sure why you would think he'd be insulted. Calling someone God seems like a compliment to me.
If you were faced with him in all his glory
-What, with nowt on?
What would you ask if you had just one question?
- I would ask him 'If God has a name, what would it be'. Either that or I would ask for a million more wishes. Oh wait, that's genies.
And yeah, yeah, God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah
-She's fucked this up, she should have started with good and moved on to great, this makes it sound like God is getting worse throughout the chorus. Next line would be 'yeah, yeah, God is alright' then 'yeah, yeah, God is shit.
What if God was one of us?
-Like when he was Jesus for a bit? Don't know, what of it?
Just a slob like one of us
-God is a slob like one of us. He used to do loads of shit, making the World, fooling people into killing their kids, shit like that. Nowadays we are lucky if he finds time to turn up in some toast.
Just a stranger on the bus
- I DON'T KNOW! What if he was a fella on a bus, what am I supposed to do?!?
Trying to make his way home
-On a bus? To heaven? Come on Lord, buck your ideas up mate, buses don't go up. Remember that old song where it goes 'You'll never get to heaven, in an old Ford car?' God is niave to think a bus would be any different.
If God had a face what would it look like?
-David Bellamy
And would you want to see
-I'd probably be a bit curious yeah but I'd probably be a bit curious just to see David Bellamy
If seeing meant that
you would have to believe
in things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints
and all the prophets
-WOAH! That's not on. Just because I accidentally look at a stranger on a bus who happens to be God, doesn't mean that I have to believe in all the prophets. Some of them sure but that Isiaih always struck me as a right chancer.
Trying to make his way home
Back up to heaven all alone
- Not all alone, Mary will be there and Florence Nightingale probably and Hitler if he was sorry. There'll be loads to do. Can't get there on a bus though (See earlier.).
Nobody calling on the phone
-I don't know his number, plus, as you've said, he's a stranger. Plus, he's on a bus, annoying when people speak on the phone on a bus. God would know that.
'cept for the Pope maybe in Rome
-'Alreet God, it's me, Benedict' Okay, so it would have been John Paul in the mid nineties.
Just trying to make his way home
- You want to get off the bus mate. Hang on, doesn't God live everywhere? This Osbourne lass is a fool.
Like a holy rolling stone
-Perhaps this means Brian Jones is in heaven? Devil's music my arse.
Next week, Bitch by Meredith Brooks.
Posted by Lee Kyle.