Woody Allen is a fucking idiot
Posted by Lee Kyle on Sunday, July 4, 2010
"Can you imagine the level of a mind that watches wrestling?"
Woody Allen said that.
The fucking idiot.
Now, I admire Allen greatly and I enjoyed Vicky, Christina, Barcelona' as much as everyone else who didn't watch it. Yet, in this instance he has shown himself to be an oaf. It is the second stupidest thing he has ever done (The 'step-daughter' thing if you're wondering.).
There are a number of things that non-wrestling fans assume about wrestling fans, tha two main points they miss can be summed up thusly:
1. We know it isn't real.
2. It doesn't matter.
With wrestling, you are guaranteed a show. The fact that it isn't real ensures this. There will be no nil-nil draws or ten second knockout main events. Sure, many of your heroes will die of steroid related heart attacks before their 45th birthday but we try not to think of that...
For nine years I was a professional wrestler, albeit at a low level. The vast majority of wrestling fans will not have heard of me, yet here I am in action. This picture is from one of my favourite matches and shows me being held by a bald man while his girlfriend sprays deodorant into my eyes. Tell me THAT isn't better than frigging darts.
It's not that I don't enjoy real sports, I do. I can talk at great length about the fact (And it is a fact.) that Les Ferdinand was a better player than Alan Shearer. I am also able to admit that wrestling can often be predictable and tedious. The thing is though, about 5 or 6 times a year something happens in wrestling that is so brilliant that it keeps me watching just long enough for the next shocking event to happen. That in turn snags me for just a little longer.
I pity people who think of Dwayne Johnson as an actor who used to wrestle. My life would be poorer if I didn't know him as The Rock. Not sure? Search for him on Youtube (It's a popular video sharing website.) and if you are still not convinced, know that it is you that is wrong.
Ultramantis Black, CT Renegade, Marty Jannetty, La Sombra, Mike 'Flash' Jordan, The Road Dogg (Who said he enjoyed the match the picture above is from, incidentally. If that impresses you, you are too easily impressed.), Osuma Nishimura, La Parka, Sid Vicious...I'm just typing a list of names now really.
Oh, through wrestling, I met Christian Slater. What have you ever done? He was at Viz Comics 25th Birthday Party. I wrestled there. Sadly, I was unable to 'accidentally' kick Jeremy Clarkson. Here is a picture of my match, illegally stolen:
Woody Allen said that.
The fucking idiot.
Now, I admire Allen greatly and I enjoyed Vicky, Christina, Barcelona' as much as everyone else who didn't watch it. Yet, in this instance he has shown himself to be an oaf. It is the second stupidest thing he has ever done (The 'step-daughter' thing if you're wondering.).
There are a number of things that non-wrestling fans assume about wrestling fans, tha two main points they miss can be summed up thusly:
1. We know it isn't real.
2. It doesn't matter.
With wrestling, you are guaranteed a show. The fact that it isn't real ensures this. There will be no nil-nil draws or ten second knockout main events. Sure, many of your heroes will die of steroid related heart attacks before their 45th birthday but we try not to think of that...
For nine years I was a professional wrestler, albeit at a low level. The vast majority of wrestling fans will not have heard of me, yet here I am in action. This picture is from one of my favourite matches and shows me being held by a bald man while his girlfriend sprays deodorant into my eyes. Tell me THAT isn't better than frigging darts.
It's not that I don't enjoy real sports, I do. I can talk at great length about the fact (And it is a fact.) that Les Ferdinand was a better player than Alan Shearer. I am also able to admit that wrestling can often be predictable and tedious. The thing is though, about 5 or 6 times a year something happens in wrestling that is so brilliant that it keeps me watching just long enough for the next shocking event to happen. That in turn snags me for just a little longer.
I pity people who think of Dwayne Johnson as an actor who used to wrestle. My life would be poorer if I didn't know him as The Rock. Not sure? Search for him on Youtube (It's a popular video sharing website.) and if you are still not convinced, know that it is you that is wrong.
Ultramantis Black, CT Renegade, Marty Jannetty, La Sombra, Mike 'Flash' Jordan, The Road Dogg (Who said he enjoyed the match the picture above is from, incidentally. If that impresses you, you are too easily impressed.), Osuma Nishimura, La Parka, Sid Vicious...I'm just typing a list of names now really.
Oh, through wrestling, I met Christian Slater. What have you ever done? He was at Viz Comics 25th Birthday Party. I wrestled there. Sadly, I was unable to 'accidentally' kick Jeremy Clarkson. Here is a picture of my match, illegally stolen: